Dating know-how

I have none.

I’ve never made it to date 4 with anyone. By the end of date three (if we even really have a date 1 and 2), we were in a declared relationship. I’m spending time with someone (‘the guy’) who actually knows how to “date'” and I feel at a bit of a loss. I suppose the only thing I can really do is to take his advice. He recommends sitting back and letting things unfold. I don’t have much doubt about where things will go eventually, but the wait is a challenge. If he has his way, I’ll learn a lot of things (hopefully including patience among them).

We have so much fun together. I really love that. He seems to intuitively know what will make me  feel good and be happy. I feel such an intense need to reciprocate that. I want to do things for him and with him. I don’t know that I’ve ever felt this invested in a person before in this way. Usually I feel like I want to help others because I like to help others and make them happy. I don’t expect anything in return and usually don’t get anything (although it’s more mutual with a few of my closest friends). I trust him and feel so cared about that I can’t imagine not doing anything I can for him.

I was a bit worried about one potential complication though. The friend from home who has a major interest in me decided that he didn’t want to move up here (he’s trying to get out of a state where he has too many bad connections). Now, he’s being evicted for not paying his rent and he wants the option of moving up here again. I made sure that he knew we may never be a couple (pretty sure that won’t happen). I also told him that I am going to date in the meantime. He’s a screwed up guy with a lot of work ahead of him to get life straightened out. I’m not going to put my life on hold to see if he does the work (completely aside from the fact that I’ve already found someone amazing that I am in no way willing to give up). He knows all of that and still might want to move up here. I’m okay with that I guess.

As long as I still get to spend time with ‘the guy’ then I am content.


~ by Kj on August 11, 2010.

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